Halloween Sucks and Other Inspiration for your Friday Pleasures

Inspiration #1)

One of the most positive things that will come from my children leaving home (in, oh, fifteen years) is that I can come out of the closet and put a big sign in my yard that says "No Tricken or Treaten you greedy little Monsters" I'm sure my own kids will find that hilarious by then.

It's not the candy--I'm all about candy--it's all the other crap. The cheap costumes, the freaky movies and TV shows, and the horrible decorations that just muck up my house. I hate carving pumpkins, I hate candy corn, and I hate being scared. My city does Trunk or Treat because the houses are so spread out it takes hours for kids to get a decent sized haul, so instead we have 40 cars that stick there back ends into a horseshoe shape and then 300 kids cycle through like the zombies--oh wait, they ARE zombies, and other creatures of death--they don't even say trick or treat. And it's cold out there. A couple years ago it was snowing and there we are serpentining through cars so we can get candy--much of which is nasty and will end up in my carpet or my child's hair.

I liked it when I was a kid--it was lots of fun--but I also bathed once a week back then whether I needed it or not and I thought Micheal Jackson was super cute. My opinions from that time can not therefore be trusted.

So, I'm having dinner with a friend last night and she hates Halloween too--there are few things better than holiday bashing with a kindred spirit--so a few years ago she says in her nephew's presence that she hates Halloween. He looks up at her with these big doe eyes and says "But you go to church. You can't hate Halloween."

Inspiration #2)

Allyson Condie left a comment on my blog the other day. She wrote a book that it getting all kinds of great reviews called The Yearbook, and she reads MY blog. Is that not awesome? Kinda freaks me out with people I know of, but don't really know, turn up on this place. I mean, it's awesome, but then I wonder who else is reading my blog. We know my mother isn't (else she'd have claimed her $100), so that's probably a good thing, and I don't think any of my neighbors do, also a good thing, but if Allyson Condie reads it--who knows. Very cool thing to consider. She doesn't have a blog though, so I can't respond in kind, so I'm doing it here--assuming she'll come back. However, if she's a Halloween lover she might not have made it this far. Bummer.

Inspiration #3)

I broke my Mighty Mouse which is the best mouse every invented. It goes with my mac and I love it, or at least I did. I only dropped it four feet onto a tile floor--you'd think it could have a bit more forgiveness in it's heart after all the months we've been together. I'm rather dispondent about it, and disappointed, dismayed, disgusted, disheartened, disllusioned, distraught, discombobulated, discommoded, and disharmonious about it, which only goes to prove that I put far too much affection into material things. I'm also rather dishabille today, especially when one considers I ought to try and be a bit more diseuse than I am, but perhaps that's to be expected when one is as disonant as I am this morning. The reason there are typos in this blog is because without my mighty mouse I don't know how to access my spell check and I'm a really nasty speller. I did try and fix a few but if I don't know how to spell them, how do I fix them? It's a quandry.


Come to think of it, two out of three of the "inspiration" of this blog are rather dis-inspriational, so I suppose you can consider yourself tricked. Tis the season.